RESIDENT RESOURCES
Roommate Agreement
A Roommate Agreement can help you set up helpful boundaries and discuss things like cleanliness, chores, sharing items, and noise levels before they become an issue and jeopardize friendships.
Tips on Resolving Roommate Conflicts
When a disagreement turns to personal insults, raised voices, or mocking tones, the conversation is no longer productive. Be careful to focus on the problem without placing blame on your roommate. If a disagreement becomes personal, you should pause the conversation.
Oftentimes during arguments we focus on getting our own point across rather than listening to your roommate. Before responding to your roommate, restate what they have said to you in your own words. Continue this process until your roommate agrees that you understand. Next, share your side. Your roommate should reflect back your ideas in their own words until they too understand. Using this technique will help both individuals feel listened to and understood, even if you disagree.
When sharing a concern, begin your sentence with “I”. For example: “I feel hurt when you don’t tell me you’ll be late”. With this sentence format we show that we are taking responsibility for our own emotion rather than blaming our roommate. The alternative sentence- “You never tell me when you’re going to be late”-will often cause a roommate to become defensive.
When you and your roommate are becoming argumentative, insulting, or aggressive, it’s a good idea to take a time-out. Have a plan in place so you or your roommate can call for a break when needed. Spend some time doing something alone that you find relaxing. When you’ve both calmed down you and your roommate can return to solving the problem. Be sure that you do return-it isn’t a good idea to leave these issues unaddressed.
Disagreement is a normal part of a relationship. If it becomes clear that you and your roommate will not agree, focus on a resolution instead. Try to find a compromise that benefits both individuals. Ask yourself if this disagreement really matters to your relationship, and let yourself move on if not.
From TherapistAid.com
What is CARE?
Care Team
Residence Life has a CARE team devoted especially to students living on campus, comprised of two Care Specialists supervised by the Assistant Director for CARE and Conduct.
A Care Specialist is a professional staff member that is best described as a non-clinical case manager. Our Care Specialists have graduate degrees and experience in case management and wellness support, and they are trained to handle more sensitive or higher levels of CARE. Contact from a Care Specialist will typically come in the form of an email, but calling can also be used in conjunction with the introductory email. The CS will provide specific resources for the situation and a request to meet, with available times or a booking link provided for easier scheduling. During the meeting, the CS will help the student talk through and process what they are experiencing, provide further resources and assistance contacting them as needed, and work on basic coping skills to empower the student in their journey to wellness. It is important to note that the Care Specialists are NOT therapists and offer only general wellness advice, processing space, and guidance with on-campus resources.
Online CARE Report
The Residence Life CARE team also reads through reports submitted about on-campus residents and coordinates outreach accordingly. Someone from Residence Life will follow up with the resident, whether that is a Resident Advisor, the Resident Director of that building, or a Care Specialist, to name a few of the outreach options. These typically include a request for a meeting and/or a list of specific resources for the situation.
If you need to report an emergency, do not use this form but instead call University Police at 360-650-3911, or dial 911. If you wish to report a crime, please contact these same numbers.
Want Help Navigating Campus Resources?
Our Care Specialists are here for all on-campus residents, not just those who already have a CARE report. If you’d like help navigating the resources we have on campus, or are in need of general support, schedule a meeting with either of our Care Specialists using their booking links:
| Schedule a time to meet with Lily! | Schedule a time to meet with Odessa! |
A general CARE meeting will follow the format above and be primarily driven by the student. It is important to note that the Care Specialists are NOT therapists and offer only general wellness advice, processing space, and guidance with on-campus resources.
